


The Boyfriend and The Fine Jar

by thornsword (eeeeeeee)



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: 3+1 kinda thing, Coming Out, Fluff, M/M, fine jar, for a friend's birthday, this is a mess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-21
Updated: 2016-09-21
Packaged: 2018-08-16 12:12:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8101969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eeeeeeee/pseuds/thornsword
Summary: Bitty is probably responsible for like..,,, half the money in the fine jar





	

“-Alright, bye Sweetheart, good luck!” Holster heard Bittle say from the kitchen. Class had ended early so Ransom suggested they steal one of Bitty’s pies before someone else got to them.“No, honey- _yeah, yeah, chirp while you still can-“_ a laugh, light and fluttery, “love you, come down soon y’hear? Bye.”

 

Now, despite popular opinion, Holster isn’t the type to jump to conclusions - no matter _what_ Lardo said - but after hearing something like that… conclusions draw themselves. He glanced at Ransom, eyebrow raised and a smirk twitching at the corner of his lips. Ransom snickered. 

 

They ran into the kitchen, interrupting Bittle’s loving stare at the now black screen on his phone. Bittle had a _sweetheart_ and they _weren’t_ the first to know? Holster takes personal offence to that. 

 

“Ransom!” he exclaims dramatically, arms spread out and chin turned upwards, “get the fine jar!”

 

Bitty yelps and almost drops his phone before placing it on the counter. He’s nervous. _Good,_ Holster thinks, _he should be, because we’re not letting him go until he cracks._

 

Ransom appears by his side after no less than five seconds, the obscenely large jar of loose change and old, crumpled notes in his arms. 

 

“You, Eric Richard Bittle-” he yells, pointing accursedly at said teammate.

 

_“Oh Lord.”_

 

“-Are accused of uttering a pet name- not _once,_ but _twice,_ and!” he pauses for effect, Ransom chuckling next to him, “not telling us - your bestest bros - about _the boyfriend.”_

 

Bitty glances around nervously. “Um, I plead the fifth?” he tries. 

 

“Don’t make us bring Shitty down here,” Ransom threatens, smirk growing ever wider, “we _will_ court marshal you. Did you, or did you not just say ‘Sweetheart’ and ‘Honey’ to the boy on the other side of the phone?”

 

“Um, that is… you see it was, er, my mother?”

 

Holster sighs, looking down at the floor. “Bitty, I didn’t think it would come to this…”

 

Bitty gulps. 

 

“Get the phone.”

 

“No!”

 

Ransom and Holster dash as Bitty grabs the phone and shoves it in his back pocket, backing away until he hits the corner. 

 

“Alright, I confess!” he gasps, and Holster fistbumps Ransom, who holds out the jar. Bitty pulls out a ten dollar bill and deposits it, his cheeks burning bright red. 

 

Holster grins. “Now my dear Bitty-“

 

“-Who’s the lucky guy?” Ransom finishes. 

 

Bitty grins and ducks between them. “I confess to using pet names, and having a boyfriend, but there’s no fine for not telling you who he is right?” 

 

“Bitty!”

 

“Goddamn!”

 

———

 

The rumour spread throughout the haus in a matter of minutes. Seconds, even. It was impossible to tell and impossible to stop. Bitty had thwarted no less than _three_ attempts at his phone from various members of the team and it had only been an hour or so since he talked to Ransom and Holster. 

 

“Hey Bits,” Lardo greeted, stepping into the living room. Bitty flinched, drawing his phone into his chest. 

 

“Hey… Lardo.”

 

She raised her eyebrow. “You okay bro?”

 

Bitty sighed, relaxing slightly. “I guess? Ransom and Holster found out I have a boyfriend and now everyone knows and they’re trying to get my phone.”

 

Lardo paused. 

 

“They can get a bit enthusiastic about shit like that,” she told him, “probably best to just tell ‘em they won’t get any more pies or something.”

 

“Thanks Lardo,” he laughed. 

 

She smiled at him before making her way up the stairs. As soon as she was out of sight she made a break for her room, yanking the door shut and pulling out her phone. 

 

To: Shits 3:04pm

 

_Bitty has a boyfriend??!!?_

 

She had so many questions. Usually Shitty had the answers to stuff like this - plus she thought he would either already know about it, or be annoyed he didn’t already know about it.

 

From: Shits3:04pm

 

_aworusfSKDF?????_  
  
since W H E N ?? 

 

To: Shits3:04pm

 

 _idk???_  
  
he just told me that rans+hols had been giving him shit bout it  
  
thats legit all i kno  
  
From: Shits3:05pm

 

_wat to u mean giving him shit?_

 

To: Shits 

 

_like_

 

_trying to take his phone n stuff_

 

He didn’t reply for a while, and Lardo flopped down onto her bed. She shouldn’t have known telling him that would force her to be on the receiving end of one of his rants about _respecting people’s privacy_ or _overstepping boundaries._ Shitty wasn’t a hypocrite - he just managed to phrase things to mean both _leave him alone_ and _deets deets deets deets._

 

Her phone dinged. The text was too big to display on her lock screen.

 

From: Shits3:06pm

 

_u need to tell them that it’s totally not cool to grab something as personal to bits as his phone bc its majorly overstepping. i wanna hear all about the boyfriend but make sure the deets are acquired through ok means. also the…._

 

———

 

“Is it rugby guy? I bet it’s rugby guy.”

 

“It isn’t rugby guy.”

 

“Ok, what about soccer guy? He’s hot.”

 

“… Well I mean _yes_ he’s hot, but _no_ I’m not dating him.”

 

“What’s going on?” Chowder whispered to Dex, who was running a hand through his hair and glaring at his textbook. 

 

“Bitty’s got a boyfriend and Ransom and Holster are trying to guess who it is,” he said, without looking up.

 

_“What?!”_

 

The trio went silent, all turning to look at him. 

 

Chowder practically _bounced_ over to Bitty. “You have a _boyfriend?!”_ he exclaimed, “why didn’t you say anything! Actually I’m pretty surprised you didn’t have a boyfriend before this because you’re _amazing._ Or did you have a boyfriend before now? Do you tell us when you get boyfriends? Is he nice? What about when you-“

 

“Good point Chowder,” Holster cuts in, “why _didn’t_ you tell us about him?”

 

Bitty, who hadn’t expected the question, fidgeted under their gaze. “I… um… I can’t tell you.”

 

He’d never been very good at lying. 

 

“Why not?” Ransom asked. 

 

“I just… can’t,” Bitty said, looking up at the cabinets on the back wall of the kitchen. 

 

Silence. 

 

“Bits he’s not like… an asshole, right?” Ransom asks. His smile has dropped. 

 

“Huh?”

 

“He’s not doing shit to you without your consent?” Holster says and it’s like the temperature drops fifty degrees. 

 

“Heavens _no!”_ Bitty bursts, waving his arms and shaking his head, “no, no he would _never-_ he’s not that kind of- he’s never laid a hand on me.”

 

Chowder throws his arms around Bitty’s shoulders. 

 

“Never?” Holster affirms. 

 

“Never ever.”

 

Ransom and Holster share face-splitting, evil smiles. 

 

“Wow that must have been hard on you Bits. Imagine if you could never touch your boyfriend Ransom.”

 

“He must be in one of those allergy bubbles-“ Ransom gasps, “I bet it’s Mark! You know that kid who had like, monkey flu or whatever at the same time Bits got checked.”

 

“You’re a genius.”

 

Bitty groans, patting Chowder on the back and wishing there was an easier way. 

 

———

 

To: dem bois (group)

 

Holster: _does he swim bc if so i know who he is_

 

Shitty: _???_

 

Lardo: _???_

 

Dex: _???_

 

Holster: _oops i meant to send that to bits oh well do any of u kno who bittys boyfriend is_

 

Shitty: _no bc p r i v a c y bro_

 

Shitty: _also there are no deets to be found anywhere_

 

Shitty: _jaques is probably asleep but if u spam him he’ll wake up i bet he knows_

 

Ransom: _true_

 

Ransom: _I swear they talk more now than they did when Jack was living next door to him_

 

Bitty: _we do not_

 

Lardo: _u kinda do_

 

Holster: _@ jack it’s the swimming guy right_

 

Ransom: _nah bro it’s the theatre dude right jack_

 

Jack: _I had a game today and I need sleep how do I stop my phone making noises_

 

Holster: _you cant unless u tell us what u kno_

 

Jack: _I’m going to go put my phone in the other room. I don’t know who Bitty’s boyfriend is._

 

Ransom: _fuck_

 

_———_

 

The door opens at like, 1am. The haus is at capacity and Bitty dusts his hands off on his jeans in preparation to tell whoever it was that they literally _cannot_ take any more people in without the floor collapsing. 

 

“…Jack.”

 

“Hey Bits,” Jack greets, raising his voice slightly over the music.

 

Bitty doesn’t exactly think. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knows that Jack probably has bags he should carry, or that there might be people with him or people looking at him but _fuck_ he’s probably drunk. 

 

He practically flops against Jack’s chest, revelling in the feeling of strong arms around him and the rumble of Jack’s laugh in his chest. Definitelly drunk.

 

“You’re here,” he giggles.

 

Jack kisses the top of Bitty’s head. “I am.”

 

“Didn’t you have a game yesterday?” Bitty asks as he leans back and regains his balance, albeit a bit shakily. 

 

Jack shrugs. “I wanted to see you. Especially after that text.”

 

Bitty’s eyes widen. “You mean Holster? He’s _literally_ the most de- determinable in the _world.”_

 

He leads them both to the beer pong table, where Lardo is smashing someone’s ego and their liver while the crowd cheers her on. 

 

“Looook,” Bitty tugs on Holsters sleeve and raises their clasped hands, “Jack’s here.”

 

_“Jack!”_

 

He gets smothered under several six-foot-tall males and laughs. He doesn’t let go of Bitty’s hand. 

 

“What are you _doing_ here man? Aren’t you like, crazy busy at the moment?” Ransom yells after they can all breathe.

 

Jack nods. He’s tense, but Bitty can’t understand why. He looks worried, and his face is doing the thing where it gets all stiff and he really doesn’t think when he kisses Jack on the cheek because that’s what he always does when Jack’s face goes stiff. 

 

The music, despite being painfully loud, fades away. Dread drops to his stomach. 

 

“I’m sorry- I didn’t mean-“

 

And then he’s being kissed. By Jack. On the lips. In front of everyone. 

 

“It’s fine,” Jack tells him, still tense but he’s smiling, “it’s basically what I came here to do any way.”

 

“What the shit just happened?”

 

They look up, and find Lardo, Holster and Ransom staring at them. 

 

“Jack’s face did the thing so _I_ did the thing and then he…” Bitty yawned, “kissed me.”

 

“That’s like... so many fines,” Ransom says, “you guys have probably just paid for new hockey equipment with your sap.”


End file.
